Coffee? COFFEE!

When last we left Peace Officer Sonny Bond he had just received a radio transmission from fellow Officer, Steve McStevedotter, who wanted to meet up with Sonny at Carol’s. Seeing as doing his job is almost always as a secondary duty to Officer Bond he heads that way now:

Carol’s is just west of where we were and Sonny is there pretty quick:

Maybe a little too quickly? Let’s try that again!

“Come on!”

Okay, this time Officer Bond obeys all traffic laws and manages not to crash into the back of another car:

Sonny takes a look over the menu:

I think we’ll stick to coffee. Sonny takes a seat across from Steve and tries to strike up a conversation:

Steve seems incapable of talking about anything but the weather… One wonders why he even called me here? Carol eventually arrives with my coffee:

drink coffee

Patrolling

Steve and Sonny go back to not talking. In the background the phone rings:

Oh, Steve wasn’t so much wanting to talk to us as the writer of this game couldn’t think of a better way to deliver this bit of information:

use phone

Sonny tries one last time to strike up a conversation with Steve:

*sigh*

With nothing else to do at Carol’s and with some small part of the story having been dribbled out, we leave. Sonny hits the almost perfect grid-like streets of Lytton:

The life of a Police Officer seems to consist of wasting gas, mostly.

Hot Blooded

While cruising the mindnumbingly similiar suburbs of Lytton:

“I did see it!”

F10

F10 turns your sirens on and Sonny is in hot pursuit!

That last bit of commentary is provided by the game unsolicited. I don’t want to think that the creators were being classist, sexist and bitter… But it kinda seems that way!

use radio

Sonny walks over to the car and looks in:

look woman

Hahahah! Your efforts are wasted stunningly beautiful 16-bit 2d woman! Peace Officer Sonny Bonds loves no woman!

But! If he was heterosexual:

get number

FUN FACT: The heterosexual male will do just about anything for, as you call it, “torrid sex.”

Hetero Daydreams

With the young lady’s number in his mitts Sonny heads to the closest phone he knows of (how did people live before cell phones?):

hi sexy

Hetero’s never win (except for all that stuff that they do!) Back to Gay Sonny:

“Miss, please stop. Your feminine charms are wasted on me. Now if you weighed about a hundred pounds more and had a mustache. I might be interested. License please.”

“Afraid not Miss. I’m going to have to write you a ticket”

Sonny hands back her license and the ticket to sign:

give ticket

“Stick and stones, Ma’am. You have a good day!”